I am just now posting this, but I wrote this last Friday…
So today I am trying to prepare myself for what’s ahead. My Great-Aunt’s funeral. My family is still trying to get a a grip on this sad event. As mature individuals, we are always aware that death is inevitable. But we are not always aware of its possibility. That is until we are faced with it.
So, I heard someone say that when we make decisions based on survival or security that we are functioning at a level beneath human functioning. THIS IS REAL! I immediately felt like that was the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Making choices based on security and survival sounds something like this:
I want to be a ___________, but I need something that will pay the bills.
This is just one of many examples, because people make security-based choices all the time in other aspects of their life. No wonder so many people are depressed! People are denying their humanity. Being human gives us the natural right to have preference and seek for that which enhances our soul.If we are only living off of survival and security, we will never transcend. It’s not living; it’s surviving.
But How Do you Know if you are doing this?
What are you happy with and unhappy with in your life right now? How did you get here? The cause is buried somewhere in your answer.
Just be honest with yourself. You deserve to live a fulfilling life!
So many times we get caught up in the destination and forget to enjoy what really matters. The present is truly all that we have. It doesn’t matter about the past. Though we may have keepsakes, pictures, and mental memories to hold on to, we only really have this moment because that is all that is real. Here are some steps that I will try and can also help you enjoy your journey:
- Slow Down and Breathe- Sometimes taking a deep breath can help you relieve stress, but also help you to realize exactly where you are. How many times do you “unengage” in activities? We drive to and from home without even thinking about the drive, we mindlessly eat our meals, and we have learned to tune out the people that we interact with, who are more than likely the people we are closest to. Practice slowing down to fully engage in your daily activities.
- Laugh- Humor is medicine for the soul. Make it a habit to find the humor in daily life. Laughing can relieve stress and also prevent it. Take time to laugh. If you have trouble finding the humor in your life, read funny stories, listen to your favorite comedian, or watch comedies. Remember that life is to short to spend the all little time you have crying and stressing out.
- Love-Open yourself up to give love and to receive it. Start with yourself and then work this out with the people that are near and dear to you. They are here to be loved, and you are here to be loved.
So, how did I end up in a room with all four of my children and even a friend’s baby all after eight o’clock at night? That’s the questioned that rolled through my mind as I sat on my bed with my laptop next to me and five children sitting, jumping, fighting, and rolling around me. I mean seriously, I thought that eight o’clock was bedtime around here. I didn’t understand, because I actually thought that I had clocked out, I thought that my shift was over for the night.
Boy was I wrong!
I had to take a few minutes to breathe. I literally felt as if I was being suffocated by an army of tiny people.
Honestly, there is only so much kid time that a mommy can handle. I have to remind myself that I am still a good mother even when I feel the need to have my own time. I would only be harming myself if I tried to overextend myself and allow my children to run over me and take all that I have to give. I need a little bit for myself, or else I’m left with nothing.
I am thankful for my children, but I would be lying if I told you that I never get tired, weary, or just plain stressed out! It’s natural to do so. I have to remember that I am not perfect and it is ok for me to be weak. I just have to ask for strength and keep it moving.
With so many obligations and responsibilities that we as parents have, it’s so easy to neglect ourselves. The problem is that we often find ourselves feeling guilty if we allow ourselves even an hour of free time. Without time for some quality R & R, we are destined to crash. Sometimes you just have to clock out after all that is required of you has been done.
As my lingered on, eventually, the kids are in their own beds and I could get back to my grown-up thoughts. I put on my headphones and drowned myself in my music on Pandora, which by the way, I think was made just for me.
P.S. Check out my page 15 Ways to Get Your “Me Time”
I hate to sound so grim, but the truth is that we spend majority of our time doing or thinking of things that have no meaning at all. These things don’t matter. Real things matter. Love, family, and service are the only things that matter. That’s real.
I mean seriously, I can think of hundreds of things that I could worry about or complain about, but I must start choosing to use my time wisely.
Start thinking of things that are real. Your time is precious. Each day, hour, and minute is valuable. What is it that you want to have completed before your last breath?
Today, I opened the gift of my future by releasing the pain of my past.
It’s funny how sometimes we ask for what it is that we physically need, but we end up getting blessed with that thing, as well as something that we spiritually need. I never would have expected the emotional roller coaster ride that I’ve been on already this year, but I also would have never expected the physical blessings and the spiritual healing.
So, I am writing this to share with you the hope that things can and will turn around. Just believe. It’s hard, I know. This month alone I have cried enough tears to fill the Chattahoochee River, so I know what pain feels like. I know what despair is. I know hopelessness, but I also know that God did not put me here to abandon me. I know this for sure.
So, things will not work out the way that you plan them! Don’t believe the hype! There is always a better plan that will give you more than you asked for as well as a spiritual blessing.